Content posted by Anthony Venditto

The holiday season has dropped on the city and to herald its arrival the good people who bring us Charmin toilet paper (and are doing God's work by the way) have once again bequeathed their annual endowment to the incontinent and colon impacted: Their Times Square Complimentary Bathrooms!

Listen up SoHo Journal readers; I have a confession to make: Despite all appearances, I am not a good person. I know, I know, for the six or seven of you that actually read my column, this revelation comes as quite a shock. But I’ve come to the realization lately that even though I am not fit for public consumption, I’m still a worthwhile member of society.  Not only that, but also worthy of your envy. It’s true. Here, let me run you through my thought process.

One of my modern day literary heroes is Esquire’s writer at large, Tom Chiarella. I delight in his carefully crafted word usage, revel in his ability to concisely comment on the world as an introspective growth tool and simply groove on his humor in general. I read a piece of his entitled “75 Things Every Man Should Do Before He Dies”. To paraphrase his own introduction, it wasn’t a checklist but a collection of experiences gained through ones’ own personal choices over the course of his life.

Happy Halloween everybody! The Season of the Witch is upon us all. So to celebrate in true macabre fashion, I’d like to present both a trick and a treat in one super cool package: My homage to the author of Frankenstein, Mary Wollstonecraft Shelly. For those of you not familiar with her story, I’ll splain:

 Like a generously lubricated turkey thermometer, spring has finally sprung–and not a moment too soon.While winter is as good a season as any for getting sociably snookered, the Winter drunk comes with a heavy price for all. I’m speaking, of course, of the cruel ennui brought upon us by daylight savings time and the glut of C list holidays.